Hello Readers, i'm back to update once again . Yes oh that photo is an old me. Yeah that photo look i'm so cheerful right :) yay now i'm not -_- will try to cheer up always . anywhooooos..... This post is especially dedicated to my only boyfie,boyfriend,friend,best friend forever and my other half of my heart that will be

  remember this moment in front of the World Largest Fountain In Asia. You came down because of if i'm not wrong i angry with you and you came down and make a surprise for me. and this you got to know my name right ? Hahahaha silly me that time. and this was our first picture together and you were so shy :P

How about this ? Remember ? you came down and make for me another surprise to MSQ and i told you on this day there's a mat who look so handsome like one actor ask for my number but i reject , Remember ?

Remember when was this ? Awwwwww, this moment was damn sweet and i was crying deep in my heart that you were so romantic to get an off day on my very special day. Dapat taw semua satu camp you off, there goes wasted your leave but you say nevermind as long as i get to spent time with you.

and the bear ? Remember i was so blur i didn't know that the red box could open and you ask me to open and i tot you were just joking and when i open i was shock, remember baby ? Two rings was inside there , with the name of mine engrave on it and yours too. And now it still clinging on my long finger baby. But yours was lost in camp. Remember ?

Remember this my very first time tonn at your hometown and if i'm not wrong i was so tired and i came down to your hometown . Just to spent time with you .. ? Remember?

Remember this photo when you are not kissing me at all and you were just facing to my face and really this photo was only the 3rd time we meet . and you were so shy at times. :P 

Remember the first time, you came to my house and let you to get to know with my family that time ? Did you still remember honey ??

Remember we went to shop, shop for our groceries at home ? Our corrrection shop for my home groceries :P yooou act like one gay in the shop-n-save , remember ? :)

Remember you met with fadira , hahahaha you keep disturb her and your friend An ask you either want to tag along to Forbidden ? and end up i hate the bitch . Remember ?

Remember this photo, we were rushing for the last train to Mustafa . Hahaha when i got a Boomz on my pay I spent about 300 hundred on thing i shouldn't spent off right . :P but too bad money can earn back baby...

and this picture we had our blast day. so called perfect daay. Bought for you that topman shirt , we went to Cathay to buy a ticket but than sold out. :( thaan we went to Grandlink karaoke macam orang gila. ^^ and we went back to Cathay, we bought a ticket movie . And i treat you to have dinner at coffee club, step kaya jap ehk baby hehehehe ^^

and remember this girl beside me. Ira. she witness of our relationship glooming, she was the one who called you Mat-Bunga, why mat-bunga ? Is was because the very first time you try to court me , you bring a letter and stalk of flower rose. That you pass it too Body Shop girl and Ira shouted at the shop , and yes baby i do still remember !! ^^ :))

Remember this baby, when you look at the moon you will ask me too look at it too, as we are from from distance but we are close to each other heart. And every week you keep reminding me that i need to endure on your NS thingy, as i know baby the more far we are the fire of love keep burning ! :)

To many memories between me and you dear. Never at all i can't remember. And i did do some shit to you when we first get to know each other, i'm sorry hubby. You gimme the chance and still i hold on to it.

Oh there a guy friend ask me, nie boyfriend buat laki ke, than i answer don't be rude and if yes why . Silly him to ask , Yakkkkdush!

Ok i'm done here reader's, Oh yes i will be working straight till thursday Oh my coach! Pffft~ but nevermind money money money! 0.0 oh just to let you know every single thing i wear,i eat, i used not a single money i used from my parents ok, hit this to your mind! :)

Asalamualaikum

Hello, i'm back once again , back to update and update. I told you before that i hate this week yes i hate and still hating it. I don't have any latest picture to upload, i don't have any latest news to share and i will only have to share what i feel right now. I'm down totally down. WHY ? I myself i not too sure. I have not been drinking or clubbing , am i putting a stop to that? Actually no I'm not. I'm still have the desire to club and drink. Yes i know by drinking and clubbing , it's not gonna settle any problem but atleast i can free my mind for awhile, for atleast that time and i will feel atleast i'm not having any problem you guys get what i mean what I'm try to say here. I don't know if you guys feel me what i felt right now. 

Please who shall i share my burden with ? God's has keep giving me with alot of test. But i still here hanging strong on to it. Still smiling eventot i have to fake it. :( You know sometimes you will suffer alot if you have to put that fake smile on your face. Its so plastic, insincere and not lively! Please god I'm only 20 why this burden i have to bear it myself. WHY ? i feel so lonely , so down my feeling is anguished . I have been crying alot and i guess there no other tear drop to be fall. It's getting dry but tears getting dry the pain i bear is still killing me. Would anybody outside there understand what I'm going trough now. Anybody ? NO :(

My anniversary with baybe is near is so near fews day away , but what will happened on that day both of us working . He's in camp while my i'm different from his world . I waited for this day but it turn up to be otherwise. I don't mine celebrate advance or belated, but how to with no money in hands. I have to survive this amount of money that i have with me to wait for my pay. Baybe, do you know how i felt and what i'm going through now ?  It's killing me keep thinking and thinking what has already happened. On that day itself you broke my heart , im too dissapointed with what actually happened . Yes you ask for forgiveness but the pain that i got on that very day , Its so hurt . But than i forgive you baybe. Next, you told me that you got a punishment for not turning up for duty and you need to do 3 weekends on July, what about my birthday ? Will my birthday will be worst on that very day ?3 weekend on july i unable to meet you . Ok i'm alright with it as i know it's my fault too . and the next want you text me , "dear, confirm i going to Australia on September" , Oh tuhan , dia asyik pergi dan aku terus menanti. Selama satu tahun aku bertahan , dan berapa lama lagi . 

You didn't even comfort me and you want me to support and give you morale support, I did . But how about my feelings.? I'm crying again.. while typing this , I just want to lead what other couple lead too . Not just weekend but weekday meet up. You must be saying when you reading this " did i ask for all this ?" .. Yes you didn't , but whenever now you talk to me you are not the shafiq i use to know . Even on the phone or face to face shafiq i know back from last year was totally different. so different now. I letting out my feeling it's is because whenever i told you , you will be angry and will not accept what i say . The only place i can let it out is where now i writing all my anguished feeling here. I'm sorry if i offend you or hurt you in anyways if my words got hurt you or skip your heart fo a bit . I'm sorry from the bottom of my heart if i really do hurt you. I don't want to demoralize our relationship by telling you what i felt. 

Relationship me and my family Allahmdulilah , my sister is gonna back with us soon. Very soon. Let me put the smile face : D, How i wish everyday this smile of me will always create sincerely and happy with my life again . I love my mom, my grandma , my sister , my niece and nephew and my relative too. Sometimes when i down i keep thinking of them and thinking the memories we shared together.

Friendship me and my girlfriends , everybody now busy working, boyfie and some just can't be bother.I dun know. I don't have alot of friends or i don't have guy friends cause i know i attached eventot having a guy friend will do any benefit. Girlfriends is way better. I'm arent prettyy or ask to be famous, but atleast if i have a true friend who will always being with me when I'm down i happy already . But i still want to make alot of friends from any ages or races . Insyallah if eveything okay, i will update with a good news .*smile  face again but deep down i'm in pain* I done here, sorry for the long post !

Asalamualaikum

damn! i have not been updating sadness or what sharks! hahahaha germs have been spread well i know :P

people have been asking me to update, some say update ur blog getting dusty , some say delete aje blog kalau da malas , some avid-reader say miss me, hahahaha! idk i have avid-reader : D

hi ! again? hahahaha, bleaahhh... okay confirm you all was asking what i post that baby photos at my previous post, hahahaha firstly they are cute, secondly my abang ipar nya adik just give birth to Nelly Ferlysha. Cute kan nama dia, sayang i haven't get her photo, she soo cute. 3rdly, duh i'm NOT pregnant get this straight la deh!

baby are born to be cute, precisely la kan!

i have been attend alot of things, My nephew, Sholihien is now a big boy Last saturday we had a circumssion kenduri for him, met all my relative bring baby along. HAHAHA! thanks auntie call me they next Miss Universe WTH! baby paiseh XP! meeting up my babygirls and yes mostly spent time with babylove. 

Okay , people been asking how's my job? what should i say ? one WORD - HAISH! -_______- 

i have been crying , they bully me and make fun of me. WHY ? they didn't talk to me and i'm so _______ !

Is all high-end like this and now when i got it people like haish .. I HATE MY JOB, they don't give me chance to let me know them and i don't know why. so let it be, I work for pay not for people right but at the same times if your environment bad will you like to continue ? But who gonna support my parents ? -__-

In this early age i need to support my parents. 

Guys tell me , how long my new colleagues gonna treat me like this way.. ! i love my old environment but old environment manager is sucky so much so does the management :'(( OH GOSH!

and now my knee dislocate will they gonna trust me and act like i play punk. Everything happened in that one day, now i can't afford for anything. My self esteem is low my confidence is not with me and my soul aren't with me.

I wanna be the old me. The gila-gila in me. The people whom know me the noisy girl where a 500m away can hear my voice from far . The girl whom cheer people up, the girl who always have kanching in her hands. The girl whom will never feel lonely , the girl who will like to disturb people , the girl whom may lame jokes and people will just entertain on to it. the girl people always call me siao cha-bo! hahahaha :').

Everybody miss me. And so do i miss everybody. :"(

Baby has spent time me this 2 weeks, but the last few days baby really dissapoint me alot. I don't wish to elaborate . and I hate it please :'( this week have been a bad week for me and i hate it !

i love my girl so much ! and i hate this day and tomorrow. Only people know! : (

k i log-out first i need to rest , Bye yall i will update again or sooner aite miss me taw! :p

Asalamualaikum